It's in the Stars

Flashback: 8th grade Science class. My teacher, Mr. Vogelsang (a wise, expressive white-bearded man with model airplanes hanging all over his classroom and an engraved name plate on his desk reading "Baron von Vogelsang"), assigned us a report on the science of our choice. When I requested permission to do my report on astrology/planetary alignment, he chuckled and said, "Sorry, young lady, that's not a real science."

Yo, tell that to these guys. Or, better yet, don't. After all, their "senior astrologers" insist the planets favor John Kerry.