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For fuck's sake, how can one be expected to maintain one's fantastically foul mood when there are gorgeous coastal panoramas like this to behold?
It's hard enough to remain unflappingly peeved when friends insist on plying me with obscene amounts of sushi and tomodachi. Sheesh.
So I've been getting shit from friends and non-friends alike for my persistent tendency toward the cynical (as demonstrated in several recent entries [memo to Tyler: the post about Dubya narrowly escaping a grenade was intended to be ironical and shit]). I'll admit, cynicism is firmly ensconced in my personal characteristics inventory, a quality that (when coupled with my inherent introvertedness) has frequently lended itself to false perceptions of me as snobbish. Only a select few have been privileged enough to gain entry beyond my shy facade and into the realm of my imagination, where it's only a matter of time before they encounter my unrestrained inner cynic. Some have run screaming. Others have made the valiant decision to stick around and have earned a GOLD STAR! in my heart for their patience and devotion.
As for the origin of my cynicism, I sure as shit couldn't say where it came from, though I'm proudly mindful of the fact that cynicism can't survive without intelligence. How to channel the inner cynic into more fruitful creative pursuits, however, is a skill yet untapped. Any suggestions?
Posted by ayelet at May 23, 2005 03:09 PMhmm... not to disagree with James, but:
cynic n 1: A person who believes all people are motivated by selfishness.
2: A person whose outlook is scornfully and often habitually negative.
skeptic n : One who instinctively or habitually doubts, questions, or disagrees with assertions or generally accepted conclusions.
I think you're a cynic, Ayelet, as proposed. However, it does seem all-encompassing... believing that ALL people are motivated by selfishness. I don't think you believe that; you're more inclined to the 2nd definition as I see it; but a real cynic is a pain in the ass really. You do occasionally see a silver lining, Ayelet. You make a point of mentioning the positive things about people.
That being said, both of these words are too negative to describe you. I just think you're a democrat who can't stand Dubya and was brought up by republicans.
As for the more fruitful pursuits, here's my recommendation. Find a musician. Or start painting or sculpting. Little motivates an artist (you're a writer, form of art too!) like anger & pain, not to mention political turmoil. Find a singer or guitarist and have them put some of your feelings to song. Hm. Maybe the next Bob Dylan or Joan Baez!
I just love you, and I think you're wonderful to talk to no matter how cynical or skeptical you may get. I think I'd much rather have the honest truth than a sugar-coated politically correct bunch of bullshit.
My thoughts on cynicism: I used to think I was a cynic until I heard a high school teacher make the distinction between cynicism and skepticism. After that, I decided that I was truly a skeptic at heart-- a cynic is too closed-minded to be descriptive of me. Yes, I can be ironic and clever and witty and maybe even sarcastic, but in my heart I am open to all possibilites. I never say "been there done that" and I respect anyone who defends a cause that I have pooh-poohed facetiously.
So ask yourself: are you a true cynic? Or are you a skeptic? I would guess that you are the latter, but then again I'm not you. However, you don't seem to me to be dismissive of things outright.
I won't look down on you if you claim cynicism as your gang set. I try not to judge other people unless they judge me first. And as far as I know, Ayelet, you have never unfairly judged me, ever.
Posted by: james at May 24, 2005 12:28 PM