Commander-in-Chair

"You! Yes you! Sit still, laddie!"

Earlier today on Morning Edition, there was a report from the small, upstate New York town where Dubya was scheduled to give a speech about his magical Medicare plan. Organizers set him up in some school gymnasium or something and, naturally, saw to it that the audience was filled with bright-eyed Bush lovers. Just like all of his appearances: Republicans only, please.

From what I heard in the report, the plan was to have Bush give his speech or do an interview or some shit like that while sitting in an important-looking leather office chair ordered especially for the occasion. But when Dubya and Co. arrived, his handlers discovered that the chair reserved for their boss man was [cue ominous music]...gulp!... a swivel chair.

Bad news.

A local handyman had to be rushed to the scene to adjust the chair so that Dubya could not distract the audience with his unbridled swiveling back and forth. Good thing his handlers forecasted this inevitable disruptive behavior and nipped it in the swivel-y bud.

I laughed, as I often do when listening to amusing radio reports (for which NPR should be commended, since I get a chance to laugh almost every morning). I couldn't help but picture Dubya in an enormous chair, swiveling unrestrained, feet dangling high above the floor like Lily Tomlin and her giant lollipop in those old Electric Company sketches (or was it Sesame Street?). Oh, the laughing. My abs hurt.

Posted by ayelet at March 15, 2006 12:15 PM